Katzisms, or What the German Language Taught Me About Life

The following were recorded jottings of some of the most brilliant phrases to ever depart a human mouth.

"German is a very scatological culture. They're obsessed with dirt, and messes, and feces."

"You're like George Washington and the cherry tree! I would have lied."

(On "hearing" money, horen das Geld)
"That's kind of weird, like Joan of Arc."

(Context forgotten)
"They muddle through life like that."

"You know Germans actually believe in beauty. Like a cult. But more about that when you read Nietzsche."

"The French believe in prettiness, but the English just believe in the Pound."

"9/10 of life is bullshitting with confidence."

(On the creativity of our colleague, Logan)
"That's very rich in fantasy."

"The power is actually in the hands of the functionaries and bureaucrats."

"A great musical orgasm."

(On, Mir geht is heute schlecht)
"We have to carry sunshine in our hearts today."

"That's a very adult thing. You have to learn to eat around the apple, even if it's covered in worms."

(On, pinkeln)
"It's a light urination."

"Self-doubt is the beginning of enlightenment."